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i've been having all these weird semi-dreams (that's what i call those dreams that don't even seem like dreams because they feel so real when the events are unfolding) and it's always something to do with me getting some kind of project, and then becoming partial to wanton acts of infidelity with some professor or the other that i happen to be working on... with... shit, i meant WITH. boof!
does that mean i have some secret sexual perversion / unfulfilled fetish / deprived animalistic craving for PROFESSORS??
<img src= "ftp://dontblink187:erpszzkb@ftp.fortunecity.com/nautica1.jpg:>
the other night i found myself cruising along with a mocalatta chill to Enfuckinrique Igfuckinlesias and singing along. (!!!) what the dilly yo? and then i went home and listened to the Japanese hardcore mp3s i dl'd earlier and ate that premium dried fruit stuff... i think i overdit it and now i'm totally regretting it because i feel like i'm 8 months preggo and i have the runs. stupid insoluble fiber. rats. i almost got rearended by some moronic woman in a minivan with rims and a spoiler and side panelling who was more concerned with eating her McDonalds and didn't have enough cowshit in her head to tell her that really heavy objects going down a really steep hill on a really slippery road can't make hair line stops.
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| Subject: | hmm. |
| Time: | 2:09 am. |
| Mood: |  artistic. | | Music: | ENFORCE Japan. |
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"Bondage is my thing. Bow to me, bitch."What's Your Fetish? Take the test at Nollykin's World
really, now.
i cut up and sewed up a couple of cool shirts this evening. raah. and those 'Mixed Beary' Teddy Grahams taste like fruit punch. gross dude.
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Saturday, March 30th, 2002
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whether or not to go to Strife on Monday.
con: i am sooo cut on time. also i don't have a lot of money. there will be too many dumb nu-metal kids there. i don't know if anyone else is going... maybe chris will be going.
pro: i kind of want to see strife, just cause they are one of those bands that i've liked forever and ever. maybe if i can pawn some cds i can make a buck or two and go.... there will be lots of non-nu metal, fun kids there hopefully. maybe that kid that i think is hott will be there. =o\ hm?...
i fixed up my car a lil bit, screwed the side splatter guard back into place, hand washed and waxed it, got it dirty again going thru construction traffic jams. >=( fuck me. i got a lunch special from this chinese shop in staten island, my mom bought as a parting thing and i didn't think they gave you this amount of food its rad, i got the meatless sweet and sour chicken special, which includes fried rice, egg roll and hot and sour soup. wicked rad.
alrighty... time for some lunch leftovers, i'm hungry!! and i gotta study and finish my applications to Rutgers and UDe
lemme know if anyone is goin to strife. im me or whatev-uhh... peas.
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SEX
[1] Have you had sex more than once: yes
[2] Tried any other positions besides missionary: yes
[3] Used your hands for sexual purposes on a partner & vice versa: yes
[4] Performed and/or received oral sex: "i only give head to GET head!" (Sex and the city<3)
[5] Swallowed: hahaha
[6] Done 69: yuhh
[7] Used food for sexual purpose: hahaha not answering this one.
[8] Had sex in a car: yes
[9] Had sex in a public place: yes <--*GASPS* MARIANNE!!! I'm sOoO ShOcKed! jeebus louise!!
[10] Had soreness or pains due to sexual activity: haha i've had bruises
[11] Stripped for someone or a group of people: yes
[12] Had anal sex: not answering that one either!!
[13] Had sex with someone you barely knew: well, i guess i can say yeah, since most of my relationships last less than a month.
[14] Spent the night in a bed with someone of the opposite sex, without anything sexual happening: derrrrr
[15] Practiced any weird fetishes: it's only weird, if you think it is.
DRUGS
[1] Smoked cigarettes: boo. yes.
[3] Puked from drug usage: yes.
[4] Smoked the killer weed [marijuana]: killer weed? dont' be gay.
[6] Tried heroin in any form: fuck no.
[7] Tried ecstasy: fuck no, what am i a dirty raver?
[8] Bought illegal drugs: duh, sherlock.
[9] Sold illegal drugs: pills and more pills
[10] Had drugs in your possession at school: yea, duh.
[11] Done any unusual drugs: just dumb ones like ritalin and cold medicine.
[12] Took sleeping pills: yup
[15] Took caffeine pills: uh huhh
[16] Used 3 or more drugs at once: ritalins, booz and weed
[17] Tripped acid: fuck acid its for hippies
[18] Taken something you didn't know what it was: are you fuckin dumb.
[19] Gone to school/work on drugs: haha that was fun. dumb as shit but fun.
[20] Been caught by your parents while you were on drugs: never.
ALCOHOL
[1] Ever puked from alcohol: i'm a mega lightweight
[2] Do you drink hard liquor or only chick drinks? when i drink i drink like mad and my body won't take shit from me and i'll throw up within 2 hours, but still be thoroughly tipsy, and start over from bottle one.
[3] Have you ever not remembered a night the next day: no, i'm not that easy to fuck over.
[4] Ever danced on a table because of alcohol: danced on a rooftop, nearly fell off.
[5] Are you a big drinker or a big pot head: i'm fucking canadian, biaash.
[6] Ever had sex because of alcohol with a stranger: nah, i'm a drunken sex virgin.
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my stomach hurts constantly. do i have an ulcer? what is wrong with me....
i think i'm going to go crazy i can feel it
my stomach fucking hurts goddamnit
serenity now...
serenity now...
serenity now...
insanity later.
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i am so totally on a thrift store kick
i <3 ny, i really do.
i <3 that you can do anything, and noone gives a shit about it...
freedom is a wonderful wonderful thing.
i've been exploring and thrift shopping non stop... i like pretending to be broke, the salvation army people usually give you deals when you do that. i mean, god... not like they have a profit to make right? i got the awesomest white belt, its about 3" thick, and at the front it drops down into a V-shape... and it is the PERFECT fit... it hangs on my hips.
all i need are some checkerboard vans and a red dress and a white postboy cap
tomororw im going to new brunswick nj
i might transfer to rutgers
if i get in of course.
im so nervous.
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Tuesday, March 26th, 2002
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i forgot to mention how, the day i got my nautica jacket, some homeboy tried to steal shoes from the Nike outlet, and the plainclothes security was this 7 foot 300 lb man and he tackled the shit out of him when he tried to run, and basically ran the teefer dude into this Kiosk, so the kiosk guy started yelling at them like "you're ruining my stor3!!!" and the dude's GF was also screaming at the security guy like "you m-f get off my b-f" and yeah my dad and i stood there and laughed at them.
in other news today was pretty boring.
my mom (btw she works at home, just fyi..) wanted a new cell phone so i went with her to pick one out, and we also got some chinese to eat and she got that Meg Ryan movie where she's some sargent and gets shot in the stomach.
eating fruit salad and reading The Scopes Trial)
anyway i'm pretty proud of myself, i sat for 2 hours and made myself understand cell division in EVERY.single.little.detailed.sub-process. it was a rather meticulous task.
i think i must be the biggest tard in the world when it comes to boys, seriously. chris called me today and i was like oh whoa, you know, now i'm all confused cuz i don't know if i'm kind of seeing this other person, i think i am, but i'm not sure (!!argh eh?) and i don't know if i still like him or if i just think i like him... maybe i do like him but i'm just one of those assholey afraid of liking people persons...
but eitherways i feel like i'm being a total asshole in this situation. i know i am SOO being a total asshole in the situation.
*groan*
i had this really weird dream last night, where i was directing some porno called "GROSS!!...Point-blanked!" Yeah it was about fuckin Bukkakke. Sick... (as in YuKk!)
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i'm watching this thing on abandoned babies on TV in VA. apparently they had so goddamned many that Texas and like 4 other states started this legal abandoning law, following places like Germany that have "safe abandonment" things where you can put babies into a drop box onto a heated bed.
i'm sitting here thinking "this wouldn't be a problem if people would just fucking accept pro-choice already instead of being so fundamentalist and close-minded about the issue, and if the government would just subsidize or give out federally-funded abortions."
that is something i'd rather pay for than welfare, or for some old flop to get his dose of viagra.
in other news, my dad is the coolest, he got me this stress squeezer that is an anatomically correct human heart. haha it's wicked creepy rad.
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yesterday my dad bought this 2Litre bottle of Kosher Coke and i was like Eww, daaadddd.... why'd you do THAT?? and tried to tell me that it was all one and the same and i challenged him to drink it, and he did and was like oh Gross and i was like i hate to say i told you so! and then he made me go buy another bottle at the Pathmark so i went and anyway i was waiting to turn and there went by me this truck that said "Hiku Hiku Co. (underneath:) some of most finest quality of bakery America" haha.
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yeah i got this Nautica Jacket and found some shoes. the neighbours cooking smells
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Saturday, March 23rd, 2002
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i'm fn tired and i have to drive to NY. fuck me.
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nothing much yesterday morning, a thrift store expedition with carol, a lot of packing, some cleaning up, one class, one interview at DeLia*s (OMG, on the application, everything was WriTtEn LiKe ThiS... stupid. oh well, i like some of their clothes.) and then at 8 or so i went to Dougs and we just bummed around for a while and played with his cats and finally left for the show at 9, got there as caste were playing, and sat in my car cuz it was so cold out, Charles and Ed and Stokey (who is acutally pretty nice once you talk to him, although the first couple times i saw him at shows i thought he was a prick) came tot talk to us and crap, and we went to get coffees and pizza (which was kind of nasty) and then we went into the show as DIECAST WERE PLAYING. Do you know how mad that made me?? Unearth played early cuz their singer was sick (it's really fn cool that they even came to play in the first case then u know) and 7a7p... which fn sucked.
i also saw none of the girls there. booo..... i dont like diecast at all really, i danced a little bit cuz i was fucking worked up for unearth and shit, and it made me mad that i fuckin missed them. i'm such a jerkoff. fuccccccckkkkkkkkkkkk mmmmmmeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!.................
at least i didnt have to pay, i walked in and some girl was like "did you pay already??" and im like yeah .... (Siiike!)
so that cute (oh sorry, i meant to say "attractive"... kevin, ya mofo...) kid that was at the aor/xlfx/dead and buried show was there yesterday night too, so i was being all fn dorky again and like "eek, julia, that's him!...ohhh, he's soo hott!". and she just looks at him and is all like "he dances like he has something stuck in his butt."
omg that cracked me up so hard.
i want to go to salvation army today before i have to leave for Staten Island, goddamnit. i was hopelessing hoping i would go at like the buttcrack of dawn like 6 am so i would miss all the assfuck on the turnpike (s) but whaaaaaaa...... this is me, i mean, C'MON right.
i'm just gonna aim to leave by 1am.
uh godamnit, i'm gone for the WHOLE DAMN WEEK. SEVEN DAYS. and i didn't get to see any of the chicks or showtime last night. boof!
i'm out.
i also plan on seeing GOSFORD PARK with my mom while i am in staten cuz CLIVE OWEN IS SOO HOTT even though he's like what, 33? wow!
ahh hah... that reminds me of that one time my cousin said he would do Jamie Lee Curtis although she was a fifty year old broad.
i like to kick, and stretch, aaaaannnnddddddd KICK!
I'MMMM FIIIFFFFTTTY.
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| Time: | 1:38 am. |
| Music: | sp33d 94r493 ~ z3r0 z3r0. |
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1. Living arrangement?: colledge... GO!
>2. what book are you reading now?: The Return of the King, aka Part III of the Lord of The Rings Triology!
>3. what's on your mouse pad?: i dont have a mousepad
>4. what's your favorite board game?: RISK, i prefer c-lo any day though.
>5. what's your favorite magazine?: national geographic
>6. favorite smells?: waterlilies and ginseng bodyspray!, orange in summer, vanilla in winter, clean soft laundry boy smells in summer AND winter
>7. favorite sounds?: laughter, heartbeats, open windows at 45mph (any faster it creates a weird turbulence and draft inside my car)
>8. worst feeling in the world?: rejection. boo hoo.
>9. the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning?: do i HAVE to get up?
>11. how many rings before you answer the phone?: 4
>12. future child's name?:boy: Jacob, Anderson, Sebastian, Armand girl:Liat Leoni, Chloe, Isobel
>13. what is the most important thing in life?: self esteem and position
>14. favorite foods?: tofu, mangoes, spicy crispy eggplant, eggplant curry.
>15. chocolate or vanilla?: neither if its soymilk, i like plain.
>16. do you like to drive fast?: yes
>17. do you sleep with a stuffed animal?: ew, no.
>18: quote of the moment: haha our school paper did a section called "things you hate" and tim said :: "ANYTHING THAT COMES FROM THE SAND."
>19. if you could meet one person dead or alive who would it be?: Nero. haha
>20. favorite drink? cool spring water, apple juice.
>21. what is your zodiac sign? saggi
>22. do you eat the stems of broccoli?: i dont want to but i do anyway.
>23. if you could have any job you wanted what would it be?:a beamer engineer, duhh.
>24. if you could dye your hair any color what would it be?:none, i'd look gay.
>25. ever been in love?: no
>26. is the glass half empty or half full?:it's just HALF.
>27. favorite movies?: i only watch porn
>29. do you type with your fingers on the right keys?: usually
>30. what's under your bed?: a monster that eats my socks.
>31. what is your favorite number?: 666
>32. favorite sport to watch?: HOCKEY!
>33. say one nice thing about the person who sent this to you: they have nice boobies.
>34. who is the person least likely to respond to this email?: this is LJ, baby.
>35. what is your biggest regret?: that i awlays waste time
>36.who is the first person you think of when you dream?: whoever pissed me off that day, i seriously have murderous dreams.
>37.what do you wanna be when you grow up?: beamer engineer
>38.if you could be anywhere with anyone right now where and who would you be with?: my bestest friends doing whatever
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this morning i went to fill my tires, and it was the ghetto gas station where you have to pay for air and it only gives you like 2 minutes so i started to screw off all my caps and check the pressure so i'd know which tires actually needed filling before i put in my moneylike any person with common sense would do. any way there were these 2 slutty ghetto mamas behind me and they were all like, "what that girl doin, she stupid, dont she know she got put money in there... excuse me, you know you gotta put money in there? it aint for free."
and i'm like Oh, REALLY.
i had to explain to them that i was doing the logical thing so i wouldn't get fucking gipped off by the machine and to kindly fuck off and learn some manners.
UGH!
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missxarsonxjuly's journal
confused.
hungry.
awake.
annoyed.
silly.
jubilant.